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body positivity

Our Bodies Are Already Ready by Jay Baldwin
Our Bodies are Already Ready 495 401 cj

Our Bodies are Already Ready

Our Bodies Are Already Ready by Jay Baldwin

Our Bodies are Already Ready

By Jay Baldwin

Summer is upon us, which for many of us brings up images of splashing in the ocean, relaxing by the pool, and soaking up the sun. But every year right before summer, the inevitable shadow is cast upon this otherwise bright season. “Are you beach body ready?” the ads ask us. “Get yourself ready for bikini season!” From magazines, to diet ads, to many other kinds of media, the message is clear: Only certain kinds of bodies are acceptable, desirable, and appropriate for summer, and if we don’t have one of those kinds of bodies, we need to get them “ready”

The Ideal Body Type?

The “ideal” body type in our culture is typically one that is white, cisgender, thin, and able bodied. Messages like this are rooted in patriarchy, misogyny and racism, and have perpetuated a great deal of harm toward people of all genders. Queer and trans bodies, which have been historically othered and positioned as less than compared to their straight and cisgender peers, are impacted by these messages in very specific ways. Not only is there pressure to “get one’s body ready” from an aesthetic standpoint, there is the actual process of moving through the world and buying a swimsuit that can be very challenging for many LGBTQ+ folks, particularly transgender, non binary and any individual – trans or cisgender – who is gender non conforming.

Swimwear can perpetuate the Gender Binary

Swimwear and bathing suits are almost always gendered pieces of clothing that perpetuate the gender binary – the idea that there are only two genders (men and women) and that there are “acceptable” or assumed ways that boys/men and girls/women will dress. They also emphasize certain body parts that can cause trans, non binary and gender non conforming individuals to experience gender dysphoria. Gender dysphoria is term that describes unease, discomfort or anxiety – sometimes severe –  that a person may have because of a mismatch between their biological sex characteristics and their gender identity. A day at the beach or the pool, one that we associate with fun, carefree times, can be a deeply uncomfortable experience, or one that is avoided altogether, for anyone who cannot find swim wear that is comfortable, affordable and affirms their gender identity and expression.

For trans, non binary and gender non conforming youth who are just coming into their identities and their bodies, this can be a particularly vulnerable time as we head into summer. These youth may be in various stages of coming out and/or in gender transition. They may wonder “Is it safe to present as my chosen gender in a swimsuit? Will I be able to use the correct changing room without being harassed? Will I be misgendered if I wear one kind of bathing suit versus another?”

Affirming Support can make all the difference

If an LGBTQ+ child or teen needs support and help finding a bathing suit, an affirming adult can make all the difference. Let the LGBTQ+ youth in your life know that you know this is not an easy experience, and that they deserve to feel comfortable and happy in their bodies, no matter what they are wearing. It is also important to emphasize that you understand that clothing has no gender, and that they are not obligated to wear anything that gender norms dictate they “should”.

Fortunately, there are now many gender inclusive companies that make swimsuits for LGBTQ+ youth and adults that are comfortable, high quality and gender affirming.

10 Best Places To Buy Gender Inclusive Swimwear has wonderful reviews of many companies that make swimwear for all bodies, genders and gender expressions, and is a refreshing departure from companies that only sell outdated “men and women” swimwear.

This summer, I want to say to the LGBTQ+ community, we’re already ready! We were ready long before anyone told us that we should look, think and act according to harmful and quite frankly ridiculous standards, and we’re waiting for everyone else to catch up. The time is now. May we celebrate our queer and trans bodies, in all their uniqueness, strength and diversity, and shine just as bright as the summer sun.

Every Body Is A Beach Body! 495 400 cj

Every Body Is A Beach Body!

Every Body Is A Beach Body!

Summer is hot and only getting hotter! For some folks, the perfect place to cool down on a hot day is the beach or the pool. But for other folks, the idea of going to the beach or to the pool, and going swimming, brings up only feelings of dread.

This apprehension may have nothing to do with the activity of swimming itself, and everything to do with the attire it requires us to wear in public. Cisgender people (people whose gender identity matches their sex assigned at birth) experience this anxiety differently than gender non-conforming people (people who do not conform with the gender norms expected of them). Cisgender people may experience body dysphoria when they put on a bathing suit. Body dysphoria refers to a “sense of dissatisfaction with one’s body, and the perception that their body is flawed or defective.” This often relates to the concept of being “beach body ready”, which is gendered in itself. In spite of the variety of shapes and sizes that humans exist in, mainstream media and celebrity culture narrows our perception of what is beautiful or healthy by proposing that an ideal body “type” exists; one for men and one for women. Internalizing the message that we must conform to these ideal body types can lead us to gaze upon our bodies with unloving eyes.

We become aware of gendered body ideals by watching the news, flipping through gossip magazines, and listening to the radio. The media makes dieting and excessive exercise seem necessary or normal. This can impact the way we see our own bodies, and lead us to obsess over whether or not our body matches the ideal “type” associated with a gender we were assigned. For men, the ideal body has been associated with washboard abs and firm pecs. For women, body ideals seem to be constantly changing but flat stomachs and large breasts seem to remain the priority. Both genders are subject to distress under these ideals, as these bodies are hardly as attainable as People Magazine makes them seem.

Bathing suits, just like mainstream body ideals, tend to emphasize certain body parts. For example, it is considered normal for men to expose their chests and wear board shorts, whereas for women, baring a completely uncovered chest is socially unacceptable in most public places. Women’s bathing suits do not cater to people with typical male body parts, and men’s swim shorts are usually not designed for people with smaller waists and wider thighs.

All of the standards around bathing suits tend to put gender non-conforming people in a position that is often emotionally, and sometimes physically, painful. This is especially true of the high percentages of trans and nonbinary people that experience gender dysphoria, meaning distress or discomfort because of the difference between a person’s gender (assigned at birth) and their present gender identity.

In the past, conversations about bathing suits typically revolved around the word “sexy”. But now, thankfully, more brands are releasing bathing suit lines for nonbinary and trans folks. This, in turn, is making the bathing suit conversation more about comfort, and less about whatever the ‘objective’ sexiness is currently in fashion.

The good news is that change is happening. TomboyX has a swimwear line with a variety of choices for masculine people, and Outplay offers gender neutral swimwear and sportswear for all.

If a LGBTQIA+ child or teen needs assistance with choosing a swimsuit, a parent can help make the experience more comfortable by letting their child know they understand how anxiety provoking this purchase can be. Parents can help by stressing that a swimsuit should be comfortable for the wearer, and allow the wearer to participate in beach or pool type activities with confidence. And parents should try to let go of any “beliefs” regarding what is normal or socially acceptable about what bodies should wear at the beach or pool.

Summer time is joyous but fleeting. All of us at Kaleidoscope wish you fun and happiness as you spend time doing summer activities with family and friends – and we hope you do not spend a moment thinking about tired, old, out-dated ideas of what a “beach body” should look like.